WHY CAN’T I HOLD BACK?
Younger males usually have had their first sexual experiences alone, when the entire goal is ejaculation. Then, when they begin having intercourse they must change behavior and learn to withhold orgasm—not always an easy switch to make. Most will master the skill within a few tries. Why others fail to develop this ability is unknown, but there is probably a genetic predisposition.
In the past decade, a neurobiological explanation has replaced other theories on the cause of rapid ejaculation. It is now believed that, for most men, there is a physical reason they have difficulty delaying ejaculation. Instead of just being “in the head” or due to a learned inability to control orgasm, most men probably have an innate neurobiological reason making them more prone to early release.
Orgasm is essentially a neuropsychological event leading to the release of semen. The same event happens in women without emission, obviously, and few women complain of having orgasms too rapidly. The difference seems to be that men detumesce (lose the erection) soon after orgasm, whereas women can continue to have intercourse and may have further orgasms. Life is not fair. If the man could continue to have intercourse after orgasm, it is unlikely there would be any complaint from either partner.
Orgasm occurs when stimulation reaches a point of inevitability. Emission releases semen into the prostate and posterior urethra, yielding the sensation that notifies the man that an orgasm will follow within seconds. Not recognizing this approaching inevitability appears to be part of the problem with rapid ejaculation.
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